Intention (at beginning) – to spend 10 minutes just to ‘see what happens’ when I sit without a specific purpose.
Setting: sitting (cushion), ambient music playing in background, natural lighting, timed
The thing that immediately comes to mind is that I noticed that when I focus on thoughts, and follow a train of thought, I start holding my breath. I had never seen that before. I know I hold my breath in life, probably in the same situations, but I didn’t know that I did it in meditation too. And, just like in life, it made me quite anxious, and need to return to the breathing in a intentional way. I had always thought that, if I was getting anxious in meditation, it was because of what I was thinking. Now I wonder if it’s because of this holding the breath – no wonder breathing helps when I’m anxious!!
The 10 minutes did not seem to take very long – such a contrast to when I started meditation and 5 minutes on the cushion seemed like an eternity. It was nice to feel that, like the 10 minutes I was investing was eminently manageable for me.
Most of this meditation was focussed on thought, really more in the observer role just to see where it went. Nothing too interesting today, just general themes about work, areas of self development – things I spend a lot of time thinking about. No revelations today!